KungFuMike.net
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No smoke, day 3 aaaannndddddd...action! - October 23, 2007

(Reconditioning Batteries)

Day 3 is slowly turning out to be worse than day 2. I woke up sweating, coughing and reaching for my inhaler every two hours last night. Of course, coffee isn't an option for another week, so I'm left with mild tea as a substitute. Mild tea is for assholes. From what I understand, your immune system drops significantly when you first quit smoking and I'm afraid that coupled with my recent bouts of insomnia are tag teaming together to make me sick. Add achy joints, a faucet for a nose and slight fever to my already large grocery list of withdrawal symptoms, which now includes interesting colored phlegm being produced in the shower, an inability to stop bouncing my right leg and a sore throat. I'm shopping around for plane tickets to a leper colony as we speak.

Speaking of grocery lists, I called around to every grocery store in the area asking about their delivery services, and all have canceled them because of the southern California wildfires. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize that we are now putting a value on the well being of grocery store employees. Next thing you know, they are going to start letting them vote. Of course, I can't move my car to go to the grocery store myself because I will lose my spot to some degenerate evacuated family's mini van almost immediately. I look out of my window and I see them circling up and down my street like sad, misplaced vultures. How the fuck is a brother supposed to make him some homemade chicken soup without a motherfucking chicken?!

Surprisingly enough, I am not running towards a cigarette yet. Even with a pair of chain smoking roommates that have openly told me they would give me a butt if I asked because they are too nice to say no, I find myself more emboldened to quit now than I was when I was sitting on that couch fighting for air Sunday morning. Having a couple smoke free days under my belt definitely helps propel me forward psychologically, even though I occasionally want to stab people in the face with a glowing soldering iron for even more ridiculous reasons than normal. Did you actually put Bring it On in your Netflix queue? You stay right fucking there while I plug this thing in.

Posted by KungFu Mike at 10:14 AM

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You should try taking some tylenol pm. It nocks me out and it will help you sleep.

Posted by: katie at October 23, 2007 12:33 PM

i started smoking like 6 months ago because i worked at a rediculous high stress job...for awhile i thought of myself as just an occasional smoker, but now its a pack ever few days. keep the fight mike. ill be with you shortly. i dont have the money to pay for cigarettes anymore.

Posted by: nick at October 23, 2007 05:14 PM

Good luck on your continuation of your battle with those suductive smokey deamons. I have had a pack-a-day habit for over 10 years now, and I also know that I really need to quit (cost, health, etc.).

Just try to stay away from people as much as possible for the next few days so you don't end up with a murder rap. It seems that "he was breathing annoyingly" isn't a very good defense.

Posted by: P-slappy at October 24, 2007 06:57 AM

Good luck on the continuation of your battle with those seductive smokey demons. I have had a pack-a-day habit for over 10 years now, and I also know that I really need to quit (cost, health, etc.).

Just try to stay away from people as much as possible for the next few days so you don't end up with a murder rap. It seems that "he was breathing annoyingly" isn't a very good defense.

Posted by: P-slappy at October 24, 2007 06:58 AM

I've been smoking since I was 11 and I'm 23, it's been a ridiculous amount of trial and error over and over and over and over and over and over... you get the idea. Good fuckin luck man, may you be a stronger willed person than I am.

Posted by: Ben at October 24, 2007 07:52 AM

My mom quit back in '97. It'll keep getting rougher in a more general sense. Keep it up bro. I think it's cool that you're updating your progress each day. I think it will really help to show everyone how strong your Kung Fu is.

Posted by: Wayland at October 24, 2007 08:20 AM

Day three is the wourst for the physical symptoms. Terrible anxiety, your skin feels like it is inside out, and if one more person does anything but not be in your general one mile personal space they should be shot. Where you shoot them is personal preference. Your past that which for some reason feels exhausting. Good work. All though it's lame and boring better try not to drink this weekend. In fact it's pretty much essential unless you feel like going through week one again.

Posted by: Eric Fowler at October 24, 2007 10:10 AM

I quit smoking, it was tough, but not that tough. Try quitting heroin you fucking baby, now THAT'S tough.

KungFu Mike EDIT: You're right. I'm going to start doing heroin so I can try quitting that as well. Brilliant.

Posted by: Lee at October 24, 2007 01:54 PM

Man, it's been 10 months and my left leg still shakes like an epileptic having the mother of all seizures. Get used to having a lot of nervous energy.

Also, why the hell would you attempt this cold turkey? That's just silly.

Posted by: noone at October 29, 2007 08:11 PM

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